Deluge - Chapter 35

[Chapter 35]

Raindrops fell on the silk umbrella, making a short beating sound.

The tone was light and dull, Xu Juan followed the sound, and suddenly found that the umbrella was a red umbrella with beautiful patterns printed on it. It was not as fancy as Pei Yu’s style, but rather like a style that girls would like.

“Is it your umbrella?”

“No, Huang Ting borrowed it from me.” Pei Yu replied casually, obviously not paying attention to such trivial matters. He stared at Xu Juan and said, “What did you just say? What did you lie to me for?”

“…”

Xu Juan was wrapped in the dense sound of rain, the crackling sound hit his eardrum, he was a little dizzy, he involuntarily took two steps back, and was a little farther away from the shadow shrouded in the umbrella, and then said: “I say now These may be a bit sudden, but I don’t want to keep hiding from you. If I enjoy your kindness to me without any knowledge of you, I will inevitably be suspected of using you, and I shouldn’t be rational. I— ”

“Wait.” Pei Yu interrupted him, “What’s the matter with you, Xu Juan, are you mad at me?”

Wherever he retreated, Pei Yu followed and covered the umbrella again. Don’t let the rain on his head.

Pei Yu may have sensed the bad breath, and anxiously defended himself: “I did go back to school this afternoon, with Huang Ting, but it’s not what you think! I made it clear to her, I said I have Boyfriend, I won’t be in a relationship with you while being ambiguous with others, Xu Juan, are you sad because of this? I won’t do this in the future, and I won’t be mad at you on purpose, don’t say anything You’re going to piss me off with something inexplicable, okay?”

He seemed to have forgotten that he was holding an umbrella in his hand, and suddenly stretched out his arms to hug Xu Juan, the handle of the umbrella was tilted, and both of them were drizzled by the drizzle.

Xu Juan’s throat was blocked, but since he had already spoken, he didn’t want to back down.

He broke free from Pei Yu’s arms and felt that he couldn’t raise his head for the first time: “I didn’t mean to be angry with you, I’m serious, Mr. Pei, I’m sorry, I want to be honest with you.”

“…”

“From the very beginning, from the day I pursued you, I have had a bad heart, not really like you. I… I got jealous, I lied to your sincerity with sweet words, I didn’t have a word of truth in my mouth, It’s all a lie to you, I just want to sleep with you, and I’ve been lying to you with the wicked thought of throwing it away when I’m asleep.”

Xu Juan turned her face away, her tone almost mechanical: “Including Hongda’s chance encounter, I’ll let you hitch a ride. , send you home when you are drunk, write “Orchid Pavilion Preface” for you, borrow your clothes on purpose, confess on WeChat, chase you stubbornly, send you paintings, take you to the mountains to see the stars, coax you and me Living together, taking you to see my friends… It’s all a script that I carefully designed, I used a scam to capture your heart, I’m a complete scum, a liar, not your intimate lover.”

His voice Confused with the sound of rain, the emotion in that word became blurred.

Pei Yu seemed to be stupid, and it took a long time to say, “I don’t understand.”

Xu Juan swallowed, his throat was so dry that it was on fire, but the rain didn’t stop, and his eyes were a little wet.

Pei Yu suddenly grabbed him and dragged him forward regardless of the umbrella that fell on the ground.

It was the direction to go home, Xu Juan struggled for a while, but did not break free.

Pei Yu grabbed his wrist so tightly that he almost dislocated him.

“—Pei Yu!”

“You go back and tell me.”

Pei Yu strode forward, Xu Juan staggered to keep up, entered the community, entered the elevator, and when the door was opened, it took Pei Yu a long time to lock the fingerprint lock, and then that The deafening sound of the door closing exploded behind Xu Juan’s head. He instinctively shook. Pei Yu took off his wet suit jacket and threw it on the sofa.

“What did you just say?” Pei Yu’s eyes were red, staring at him, “Do you say it again?”

“…” The

lights in the living room were dazzling, Xu Juan was standing in the entrance, his voice was not loud, but his voice was clear: “Very well. Sorry, Pei Yu, I lied to you, I lied to you all the time.”

Pei Yu still couldn’t understand: “What did you lie to me? Is it fake that you like me? Is the thing you gave me fake? Is it fake to talk to me late at night? Run out of the birthday party, give up everything and follow me, It’s also fake?”

“…”

“Including what you said, next year’s birthday, want to continue to eat the noodles I cook by myself, is also fake?”

“Yes, it’s all fake.”

Xu Juan lowered his head, eyelashes on his cheeks A dark shadow was cast on it: “I’m sorry to mislead you and make you have wrong illusions about me. I’m not at all the same image you like in your heart. I don’t want to continue to lie to you. Now , I’m afraid of retribution.”

“Do you think you won’t be retributed now!” With a “clang”, Pei Yu kicked the chair beside his feet.

Xu Juan’s eyelids twitched, thinking that Pei Yu was going to keep losing his temper, but Pei Yu suddenly came over and hugged him, his tone was light and urgent, and a little aggrieved, accusing him: “Xu Juan, why are you so squeamish? Didn’t I deliberately piss you off, I’ll be back soon after, I just sent you a WeChat message and wanted to go home and cook for you—in one afternoon, I made you eat vinegar for a few hours, and you Can’t stand it anymore? Do you have to take revenge on me? Why did you make up such a ruthless lie to scare me, what do you want? Can you not torture me?”

“I… I’m not, I didn’t scare you. ”

…”

Pei Yu was stunned for a moment, his eyes seemed to be rusted, and his eyes were a little empty when he looked at Xu Juan: “Then what do you mean? You said this when I was already in love with you, do you want me to die?” ”

He didn’t let go and kept his arms around Xu Juan.

But there was no warmth in this hug, and it couldn’t ease the freezing atmosphere between them.

Xu Juan’s clothes were wet, and it was damp and cold to the touch between the two of them. He seemed allergic to the cold air, so he couldn’t help but sneezed lightly.

As soon as he moved, Pei Yu’s tense body shook with him, like a bird frightened. Even if he didn’t want to, he revealed his most vulnerable side.

Pei Yu still couldn’t seem to believe it.

too suddenly.

One second they were still eating noodles sweetly, the next second Xu Juan stabbed him lightly, killing him without blood.

Xu Juan was froze all over, and his mind was a mess.

He found that his short twenty-six years of life was an impulsive joke.

In the first 20 years, he was under too strict control and had no freedom at all. Then, for freedom, he made an impulsive decision.

Six years later, he repeated the same mistakes, and once again pushed himself into an embarrassing situation because of impulsiveness.

If it’s just his own joke, it’s better to say.

But this time, he dragged Pei Yu into the water. He wanted to play a hysterical farce. He could just do it himself. Why should he implicate innocent Pei Yu?

“I’m sorry.” Xu Juan suppressed all the complicated and secret emotions in his heart, and tried his best to apologize sincerely.

But Pei Yu didn’t want his sincerity: “I don’t understand.”

Pei Yu suddenly said: “Why? It’s fake that you like me, so why do you do those things for me? Just because you want to sleep with me? We are together So many days, if you don’t go to bed, do you have no feelings for me, Xu Juan? Obviously we can read books together and grow flowers together, and we can be very happy together, but you turned your head and told me that you never loved me. Everything has never existed before!”

“Because I—” Xu Juan paused, “I’m that kind of person, I’m sorry to disappoint you, I’m just a scum who is greedy for novelty and sees someone who loves someone, Before I met you, I had dumped a lot of exes. I liked each of them briefly, but I couldn’t talk about love. If I meet the next one I like, I will change the target, sorry.”

“…” Pei Yu Yu stared at him blankly, his beautiful eyes were almost out of focus, “So you suddenly said this to me, you, have you found your next target?”

Pei Yu grabbed his arm tightly: “—Xu Juan, do you like it? Fuck someone else?! The one with blue hair?!”

“You talk! Why didn’t you answer me!” Pei Yu’s tenderness and shyness yesterday, and the tender love that he had carefully held for him, were cut into a crack by his knife, and a piece of slag stained with his heart fell out of the crack. .

Pei Yu’s eyes were red, his face sank, and he pushed him unbearably.

Xu Juan slammed his back against the door, and did not resist at all.

He looks so decadent now, like a marionette, with a gorgeous shell, an empty soul, and even his eyes are blank.

“No.” Xu Juan softly spit out two words, lowered his head and said, “I don’t like others, I just…I don’t want to lie to you anymore.”

“Then what do you want to do?”

Pei Yu was silent for a long time , forced himself to calm down: “We were fine, but you suddenly realized your conscience, stabbed me, and then innocently said, you are for my good? You don’t want to do bad things anymore, you want to be a good person? What about me? What do you want me to do? After you confessed, you want to break up with me, is that what you mean?”

Pei Yu’s calmness did not persist for half a minute, he would not do anything to Xu Juan, but when people were so sad and angry, their hearts boiled I couldn’t hold back my emotions, and I had to find something to vent.

Pei Yu just kicked over the chair and kicked down the coat rack next to the entrance. At the entrance of the chaotic living room, he was carrying the light on his back, but felt the light was dazzling and hurt his eyes. He opened his mouth and his voice was slightly hoarse: ” You want to break up, don’t you?”

“…” Xu Juan slowly exhaled, raised his hand to cover his forehead, and covered his eyes, “No, I don’t want to break up, I don’t know, I…I just want to Confess, but I thought you would want to break up, I told the truth, will you continue to be with me?”

He was incoherent, his previous momentum was gone.

He was not like this before, but it seems that it is not surprising that the situation has developed to today, at least Pei Yu is not surprised.

Maybe because I had an intuition long ago, I felt trembling and I didn’t feel that I was deeply loved, so when the truth was exposed, I was sad or angry, even if I deceived myself and refused to believe it, I didn’t feel particularly surprised.

Including Xu Juan.

He said that everything is fake, but there are some real clues in the fake. No one can live as a 100% fake.

It’s just that Pei Yu didn’t expect that Xu Juan really didn’t love him that much, and he didn’t want to think about him at all. At this moment, he still refused to spare his life, and decided to break up, instead he threw out “I thought you wanted to break up”, Put all the problems on him, and let him be the one who slashes himself with a knife.

“Xu Juan.” Pei Yu was so angry that he was out of anger, “What do you mean? If you want to break up, just say it yourself, don’t pretend to be innocent in front of me, I’m sorry for you! Am I letting go? , you will relax, you can comfort yourself pitifully, you didn’t dump me, I took the initiative to abandon you, you did nothing wrong! Even if you missed it before, you can write it off now?!”

“…I didn’t think so. ”

Then what do you think?!”

Pei Yu has never been so angry with him before. In fact, he is not so angry, but losing his temper is a decent disguise, better than covering his heart. Cry a hundred times better.

Pei Yu’s eyes were red, he pulled Xu Juan away from the door and opened the door: “Don’t let me make a decision, if you want to leave, leave now and never come back.”

[End of This Chapter]